Sunday, September 07, 2003

he was greasy anyway

I haven't received my US Weekly in the mail yet (the perfect commuter magazine, I have found, because it takes exactly 45 minutes to read through and brings no guilty feelings upon being thrown away immediately afterwards) but I heard on the radio that Uma Thurman and Ethan Hawke are splitting up. Oh my land!

Ethan and Uma used to live quite near our neighborhood, before they moved. We saw them out once with their little celeb-baby, wheeling around in front of a hardware store. They looked utterly normal. The only reason I even paused to look, in fact, was the fact that she was so damn tall. Once I realized that it was them (I had just seen "Gattaca" fairly recently), I tried to play it off all cool, pretending not to have noticed, but I didn't really need to pretend--we were walking in opposite directions and they were soon out of sight. Uma looked pretty, but in a regular-person way, and Ethan looked just mainly greasy and stanky. Their kid was just some blonde kid. They were just...normal. But I think that many celebrities that live primarily in New York are by and large more normal than those who live in LA. LA seems like a shiny-plastic-freakshow, and after watching "Barton Fink" on the Independent Film Channel yesterday afternoon, I also know its a place where they destroy your creative spirit and also have dingy hotels with hallways that burst into flame after your homocidal maniac neighbor kills your mistress with an axe.

(New York celeb-related sidebar of envy: one of the residents in my program lives downtown in the same building as Conan O'Brien. I am green, I tells you. If I lived in that building, or even in that neighborhood, Conan and I would totally be tight, because he and his wife have a dog, just like us, so we'd be bound to meet at some point on the street. But we don't live in that building, so Conan and I will never be BFF. Right now, the only celebrity that we've met via dog-connection is Ken, the classic-rock DJ who has a daily show on 104.3 FM. It's just not the same.)

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