Friday, August 17, 2007

next stop, carnegie hall

Dude, I have to step back from the chasm of Duplo madness. Ever since I lost that auction (well, let's face it, given the price that the item went for, I was never really in the running--I just thought I was because I did not know about auction sniping and all that stuff you guys told me about after the fact) I have been obsessed with finding another lot of Duplo to bid on. There's nothing quite approaching the majesty of that other Duplo set (Two helicoptors! Sweet Jesus, there were TWO of them!) and quite frankly, most of the stuff being sold is kind of scrappy and is probably worth less than the eventual shipping price, but hell, I have to have dreams, or else I have nothing. And now I will stop saying the word "Duplo" before someone kicks me in the head.

Yesterday, I was working on putting an arterial line into a patient pre-op. To be fair, it was a difficult a-line placement, such that the attending and I were working concurrently, one on each arm, since the patient had had many radial sticks in the past few weeks so both arteries were probably thrombosed. I was in the middle of one attempt when the patient (who had been mumbling incoherently up until that point) turned to me and said, clear as day, "You can't do anything right." True, she was demented, and a schizophrenic on top of that, but man, you really know how to wound someone, lady.

That was kind of bad, but worse was this other time I was struggling with a difficult line on an awake patient, and when I finally managed to get access, high fives all around, the patient said, "Well, I guess practice makes perfect, doctor." Note heavy sarcastic emphasis on "doctor."