Friday, May 21, 2010

hi again

I'm posting! Two days in a row! Because I am nothing if not inconsistent in the attention to which I pay this blog!

So Cal and I made the cookies, and I'm not going to tell you that they all turned out great, because while 23 of them turned out in decent enough shape to send to school, 15 of them (the ones on the pan closest to the bottom rack of the oven) turned out like this:

OK looking on one side, horror charred cinder on the other. Just like the Phantom of the Opera.

They still tasted OK though, so while I sent the 23 aesthetic ones to school in a box (luckily there are 22 kids in Cal's class), I couldn't quite bring myself to throw out the burned-on-the-bottom ones, because hey, don't waste food. So overall, carbonization aside, I would classify the cookie-making as a marginal success of family activity cum math lesson. If I have a pan with three rows of five how many cookies do I have and how many more do I need to make to make sure everyone in your class gets one cookie, etcetera. Not that I have to trick Cal into learning math (he actually has a wonkish devotion to all things mathematical and clamors for us to get him math workbooks, which I find alternately weird and satisfying) but it's always nice to have real life applicability.

Oh, one more thing from inside Target. Who else thinks that Blue Bell needs to update the packaging on their individually-wrapped ice cream products line?

The second one in particular is horrifying. Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? She ate too many ice cream sandwiches, that's what. And now LOOK AT HER.

And now, for no other reason than because she looks cute, a picture of Cooper.

Periodically I am obligated to show some sort of photographic evidence to my mother in law that we are not KILLING THE DOG as she so heartily insists. Look, it's not that we don't care about the dog, it's just when you have two kids, the dog is not your third kid, the dog is a dog. I know several people who have dogs-as-children who are about to have human children soon, and I keep trying to warn them that look, I know you love your dog, but be prepared, Rover/Spot/Cujo is in for a major downgrade in status. On one hand, it's kind of pathetic for the dog. But on the other hand, I don't give my children squeaky tennis balls to chew. So there you go.


  1. Ahhh! The burned cookie underside dilemma. Usually my trick is to slightly undercook the cookies when I bake them, because they will continue to cook when you take them out and put them on top of the stove to cool down. (I do the same to brownies, to keep them fudgy.) Also, I always take out the bottom tray first, and maybe give the top one an extra minute. If you're concerned about solidification, you can make some room in the fridge and let them cool off there (covered with foil or wrap), so they don't lose moisture while cooling.

    Better luck next time!

  2. Anonymous8:09 PM

    put them on a cooling rack after you take them out of the oven. otherwise, they keep cooking on the bottom.

  3. Anonymous9:21 PM

    aww...poor little Cal and Mack give much loving attention to her?

  4. Anonymous11:45 PM

    If you get an air bake pan, it's almost impossible to burn cookies anymore, fyi. My mom never baked cookies for my classmates or my summer birthday. You rock anesthesiologist-mom!

  5. Anonymous1:03 AM

    Oh my gosh. BOTH the guy and the girl on the ice cream boxes need to lay off the ice cream.

  6. Anonymous1:16 AM

    OK, so you're a fancy pants physician (who just passed her boards,) gifted writer, cartoonist, blah, blah, blah.

    Frankly missy, if it weren't for your perennial Christmas decor, carbonized cookies and wicked sense of humor I would have stopped reading your blog lo-o-o-n-g ago. There is simply no fun in perfection.

    Anyway, thanks for being you.
    (Please don't learn how to cook.)

  7. Anonymous5:37 AM

    Actually, i am glad you post up a photo of Cooper. You have not mentioned her in ages, and i kind of missed her! :) Also, good to know that when the human children start arriving, the dog naturally gets knocked down the totem pole. I was worried (for myself) when i heard horror stories (true, reported in the news of my local paper) of mothers who shoved their kids to grandparents and rather spend time with their pooches. As much as i love my dog, that was still appalling.

  8. Is it wrong that I quite like burnt cookies? Mmmmmmm!

    I've never understood why people have to bring cookies, sweets or cake into school/work on their birthdays? Surely every one should be bringing them stuff?

  9. Anonymous9:24 AM

    Michelle, why did Joe and you decide to stay in GA instead of going back to NY?

  10. Is that really a 5 year old wearing hoops, pearls and lipstick?

    I thought that shit only happened in Texas at toddler beauty pageants. Yeaoza!

    Congrats on the boards!

  11. Is that man on the ice cream box Coach Lubbock from Just the Ten of Us??

  12. In our family, while the dog lost status by failing to become a human child when the baby was born, she is benefiting in spades from his sloppy eating habits and has already eaten a peanut butter cracker and most of two scrambled eggs today. My son also likes to crawl in bed with her and pet her, which she sometimes likes (depending upon his vigor).

  13. Aw, poor Cooper! Do your kids like the dog?

  14. This comment has been removed by the author.

  15. Congrats on passing your boards!!

    The Coopster! She's looking good.

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  17. Anonymous12:27 PM


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  19. Anonymous5:22 AM

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  23. Anonymous4:17 PM

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  25. Time for another post..please

  26. Anonymous2:18 PM


  27. Anonymous9:37 PM

    I think it is so sad when dogs get "downgraded" in status just because one has kids. They are members of the family too... true, they are not humans, but they are deserving of as much unconditional love as they give (which is to say, a lot.)

  28. Anonymous4:19 PM

    I second the air bake pan advice...and if you bake them on the middle or upper-middle rack they usually wont burn on the bottom. But then, of course, you cant bake more than one tray of cookies at a time!

  29. I think that every time I am in the ice cream aisle!

  30. Anonymous3:09 AM


  31. Anonymous9:18 AM

    To avoid the black bottoms on cookies, you can start a pan on the bottom rack, then move it to the top rack. For example:
    7:00 pan1 goes on the bottom rack of the oven
    7:05 pan1 moves to top; pan2 added on bottom
    7:10 pan1 removed from oven; pan2 moves to top; pan3 added on bottom
    7:15 pan2 removed from oven; pan3 moves to top; pan4 added on bottom...

    Cooking is great for teaching kids some practical math. Also play dominoes, cribbage, and yatzee.

  32. LOVED the Baby Jane reference... thanks for the laugh.

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  35. BabyJaneBlueBell10:24 AM

    BUT...b-but... That Blue Bell girl is ME! To clarify, The pearls, garish makeup, hat, etc., are for playing "dress-up" - like at an old-fashioned little girls' tea-party or ice cream (sandwiches) social. Today "dress up" is more like imitating Bratz dolls, or so it seems to my curmudgeonly, nostalgic, sentimental self. But I digress...

    Every few years I poke around online to see if anyone has mentioned anything about the Blue Bell ice cream sandwich box. It's like Googling yourself only weirder, guiltiest, and harder to resist ; p I used to be sooo excruciatingly embarrassed by the thing but now I hope they never change. It's really wonderfully amusing and great fun to show the pics to people at parties. Their startled faces, as recognition hits them, are fantastic.

    And yes, I do like ice cream sandwiches, but I actually didn't as a child. I wasn't big on sweets.

    And no, there's no big money.

    Also no, my feelings aren't hurt. It's all fun! Thanks for the laughs!

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