Thursday, June 03, 2004

so long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye

I find it both true and unfortunate that the most important things are the hardest to say. I just don't think I'm very good at saying goodbye to people. What I would like to be an elegant and pity farewell, where I say meaningful things and the other person understands exactly what I mean, ends up being this awkward dance of, "I wisht ya didn't haves to go," "Yeah, but I gots ta." Goodbyes are hard for me. Maybe I just shouldn't do it anymore.

Since I've been in school for, oh, the past 24 years, June is always sort of a season of melancholy. Sure, summer vacations were great (when I had summers off), but finishing up another school year always meant goodbyes in one form or another. And I just don't like saying goodbye to people. And not just friends, either--I don't like saying goodbye to anyone. Thoughout my academic career, there were tons of people in my graduating classes that I never hung out with, didn't even like that much, to be honest, but it always made me sad to think that I might never see them again. It's sad to lose people, you know? Even if I didn't actually engage them, it was always comforting to know that they were there, lurking in the scenery.

However, having said all that, it's my 5-year college reunion this weekend, but I'm not going. Well, first of all, my middle sister is graduation from college on Sunday, so I have to be there. Secondly, and more importantly, the people from college that I care about that wanted to keep in touch with, I already do. I see them, I talk to them, we make plans when our paths cross. And I guess I'm not really sure what else would be the point of reunion. Visiting the campus? Standing under a tent for a cocktail reception getting schmoozy and boozy? Sleeping in the dorms? Well, sounds real fun and all, but...pass. Maybe that shows I don't have college spirit or something. I don't know. I loved college, but I don't want to re-live it or anything.

* * *

In other news, people can be so mean sometimes. I was walking down the street, and I see a little toddler, maybe 2 years old, walk up to the carriage of a baby who looks to be 7 or 8 months old. The toddler is smiling at the baby, and the baby is smiling at the toddler. Toddler's mom comes up to the scene and says something like, "Oh, looks like you found a little friend! How nice!"

Baby's mom, standing behind the carriage, snaps, "Well, I think this is completely unacceptable, and you should teach your child not to go up to other people's babies!" And with that, she flounces away, leaving the toddler and other mom speechless.

I know, toddlers have germs (I assume this was the issue, the kid wasn't slapping the baby around or anything), but come on, it's not like the kid was defecating on the baby's carriage. And wouldn't there have been a better way to deal with that? I don't understand people sometimes. It takes so much more effort to be mean than to be nice. Even just in lung power alone.

* * *

I'm having dinner with Jamal tonight. Strange as it may sound, I haven't seen him in over a year. Intern year sucks, but I should try harder to keep up with people. We have some hard-core catching up to do.

Currently reading: "The Dogs of Babel". I just started it, so I can't really tell you that much about it yet. But there's a dog in the story! I like dogs.

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